Model Essay 4: Traffic Congestion
Question type: problem and solution. Both halves are marked, and every solution must answer a problem you actually named.
Unofficial original RCF practice material
Original question and essay written by RCF English. Not endorsed by the British Council, IDP: IELTS Australia or Cambridge University Press & Assessment.
The question
Traffic congestion is becoming worse in many large cities.
What problems does this cause, and what measures could be taken to address it?
Write at least 250 words.
The plan
| Paragraph | Content |
|---|---|
| Introduction | Name the counter-intuitive fact that organises the essay: building more road capacity generates more traffic. Signal both halves. |
| Body 1 | Problems: time lost from the economy; air quality; and the way congestion pushes people into cars by making buses unreliable. |
| Body 2 | Solutions that address those problems: pricing the road space, and giving buses separate lanes so they escape the congestion they are stuck in. |
| Body 3 (short) | Why building more roads is not on the list - the induced-demand point, delivered as the essay's one real insight. |
| Conclusion | The general principle: congestion is a pricing problem, not an engineering one. |
The model essay
Question: Traffic congestion is becoming worse in many large cities. What problems does this cause, and what measures could be taken to address it?
Congestion is one of the few urban problems that reliably gets worse as cities get richer, and the standard response to it - building more road capacity - has a long record of failure. Its effects are serious, but the measures that work are reasonably well understood.
The most obvious problem is the loss of time. Hours spent stationary are hours not spent working, resting or with a family, and because the delay falls on deliveries and tradespeople as well as commuters, the cost passes into the price of almost everything a city consumes. The second problem is air quality: vehicles in slow-moving traffic emit far more per kilometre than vehicles moving freely, and the pollution is concentrated exactly where people live. The third problem is the least obvious and the most damaging. Congestion makes buses slow and unpredictable, since a bus stuck in traffic arrives late and eventually stops being worth catching, and every passenger it loses to a car makes the traffic slightly worse. The system pushes itself in the wrong direction.
The measures that work follow from that. The first is to charge for road space at the times when it is scarce, as several cities now do; this reduces the least necessary journeys, which are a surprisingly large share of them, and raises money that can be spent on the alternatives. The second is to give buses and cycles physical priority - separate lanes that traffic cannot enter - so that public transport escapes the congestion rather than sitting in it. Reliability, more than cost or comfort, is what persuades people to leave a car at home.
What does not work is building more roads, because the new capacity is filled by journeys that were previously not worth making. Congestion is a pricing problem, and pricing is where the solution has to start.
Why this answer works
- The two halves are balanced. Three problems, two solutions, roughly equal space. An essay that spends 200 words on problems and 60 on solutions loses Task Response marks even if the problems are brilliantly described.
- Every solution answers a problem that was named. Road pricing answers the loss of time and funds the alternatives; bus lanes answer the third problem directly. Nothing floats free.
- The third problem is a feedback loop, not a list item - congestion makes buses slow, which pushes people into cars, which worsens congestion. Showing a mechanism is what lifts this above the standard pollution, stress, accidents list.
- The essay has one genuine insight and saves it for the end: new capacity generates new traffic. Placing it in the final paragraph gives the conclusion something to do.
- Hedged honestly: a surprisingly large share of them, as several cities now do. Neither invents a number, and both sound informed.
- Cohesion is carried by meaning, not by connectives. There is no Firstly, Secondly, Moreover, In addition. The paragraphs connect because each one follows from the last - which is what the Coherence criterion actually rewards.
- 291 words.
Language worth borrowing
- has a long record of failure
- the cost passes into the price of almost everything
- The system pushes itself in the wrong direction.
- The measures that work follow from that.
- journeys that were previously not worth making
Check your own attempt
- Are your problems and solutions given roughly equal space?
- Does each solution answer a problem you actually named?
- Did you explain a mechanism, or list effects?
- Did you avoid the Firstly, Secondly, Moreover skeleton and let the ideas connect instead?
- Are you between 260 and 300 words?
Now try this variation
In many cities, the cost of housing has risen far faster than incomes. What problems does this cause, and what could be done about it?
The same discipline applies: name a feedback loop rather than a list, and make every solution answer a stated problem. Try to find the equivalent of the induced-demand point - the widely believed remedy that makes things worse.
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Essay 5: Children and screens
The two-part question.
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