Model essay 1 of 10: opinion

Model Essay 1: Technology and Teachers

Question type: opinion. The instruction is to what extent, and that phrase is an invitation to agree partly - provided you say exactly how far.

The question

Some people believe that developments in technology will make teachers unnecessary within a few decades.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Write at least 250 words.

The plan

ParagraphContent
IntroductionRephrase the claim. Position: largely disagree, but concede that one part of teaching genuinely is being replaced.
Body 1The concession. Delivery of information is being automated, and well. Say so honestly and in detail - this earns credibility.
Body 2The main argument. What teaching actually consists of: diagnosing a specific misunderstanding, and supplying motivation. Neither is information delivery.
Body 3 (short)The evidence from the last two decades: enormous investment, and the teacher-to-student ratio has barely moved.
ConclusionRestate the position with the qualification intact. The role changes; it does not disappear.

The model essay

Original RCF model answer (289 words)

Question: Some people believe that developments in technology will make teachers unnecessary within a few decades. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The claim that technology will shortly make teachers redundant has been made in some form since the arrival of educational television, and it has never yet come true. I disagree with it, although I think one part of the prediction is correct and deserves to be taken seriously.

The part that is correct concerns the delivery of information. A recorded explanation by an outstanding teacher can be paused, repeated and watched by millions, and it is almost always better than an average explanation delivered live to thirty people. Software can also mark, drill and adapt the difficulty of practice questions faster and more patiently than any person. If teaching consisted of transmitting content and setting exercises, the prediction would be sound.

But that is not what most of the work is. The difficult part of teaching is diagnosis: working out which particular misunderstanding is preventing this specific student from progressing, when the student usually cannot say what it is and often does not know. A good teacher infers it from a wrong answer, a hesitation, or a question that reveals a gap three topics further back. Adaptive software can identify which question was failed; it is much weaker at identifying why. The second irreplaceable element is motivation. Most students work because someone they do not want to disappoint is expecting the work, and no amount of technology has yet produced that relationship.

It is also worth noting the evidence of the last twenty years. Very large sums have been invested in educational technology, and the effect on the number of teachers employed has been negligible.

In my view, therefore, technology will continue to take over the parts of teaching that can be standardised, and this will change what teachers spend their days doing. It will not remove the need for them.

Why this answer works

  • The position is stated in the first paragraph and never wavers - I disagree ... although one part is correct. That is a precise answer to to what extent, not a fence-sit.
  • The concession comes first and is generous. Paragraph two argues the opposing case properly, including a conditional that concedes everything - If teaching consisted of transmitting content, the prediction would be sound. Granting the strongest version of the other side is what separates a Band 8 argument from a Band 6 one.
  • The central paragraph makes one distinction and develops it - between delivering information and diagnosing a misunderstanding - and then supports it with the mechanism (a hesitation, or a question that reveals a gap three topics further back).
  • The short fourth paragraph is deliberate. A one-sentence-idea paragraph after three long ones varies the rhythm and reads as control. It also supplies evidence without inventing a statistic.
  • No fabricated data. Very large sums and negligible are honest and cost nothing; $13 billion and 2.7% would have earned no extra marks and risked implausibility.
  • The conclusion moves the position slightly forward rather than repeating it: the job changes rather than disappears. Conclusions that merely restate the introduction in synonyms read as padding.
  • 289 words. Comfortably above 250 and below the point where accuracy starts to suffer.

Language worth borrowing

has been made in some form since
although I think one part of the prediction is correct
If X consisted of Y, the prediction would be sound
It is also worth noting
the parts of teaching that can be standardised

Check your own attempt

  • Did you state how far you agree, not just that you agree?
  • Did you argue the opposing view properly before answering it?
  • Do your body paragraphs make genuinely different points, or the same point twice?
  • Did you avoid inventing figures?
  • Is your conclusion different in content from your introduction, not just in wording?
  • Are you between 260 and 300 words?

Now try this variation

Some people think that online learning will eventually replace attending school in person. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The topic is close but the answer is not the same, because this question is about the place of learning rather than the person teaching. If you reuse the essay above, you will answer the wrong question - which is exactly the danger of memorising.

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