Model Essay 13: Learning Online Instead of in a Classroom
Advantages and disadvantages: do the advantages outweigh them?. The question, a plan, the essay itself, and why it would score well.
Unofficial original RCF practice material
Original question and essay written by RCF English. Not endorsed by the British Council, IDP: IELTS Australia or Cambridge University Press & Assessment.
The question
More and more people are choosing to study online rather than in a classroom.
Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Write at least 250 words.
The plan
| Paragraph | Content |
|---|---|
| Introduction | Rephrase the trend. Position: advantages outweigh, for adults and for those far from a campus. |
| Body 1 | The advantages: reach, cost, and studying while working. |
| Body 2 | The disadvantages, put honestly: dropping out, no classmates, and subjects that need a laboratory. |
| Body 3 (short) | Why the balance still favours online study: something is better than nothing. |
| Conclusion | The verdict, with the group it does not suit named. |
The model essay
Question: More and more people are choosing to study online rather than in a classroom. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
Studying online has grown quickly, and many people now take a course without entering a classroom. In my opinion the benefits of this change are greater than the drawbacks, although it does not suit every student or every subject.
The main advantage is reach. A student in a small town can take a course from a university hundreds of kilometres away, at a fraction of the cost of moving there. Online courses are usually cheaper to run and therefore cheaper to buy, and recorded lessons can be watched late at night, which matters enormously to people who study after work. For an adult with a job and a family, this is often the difference between studying and not studying at all.
The disadvantages are real, however. Far more students begin online courses than finish them, because nobody notices when they quietly stop. A classroom supplies pressure and company: classmates to compare notes with, and a teacher who sees confusion on a face and explains again. Some subjects also resist the format entirely, since a nurse or an engineer cannot be trained through a screen alone.
Even so, the comparison is not between online study and perfect classroom study. For most people choosing an online course, the realistic alternative is no course at all, because the campus is too far, too expensive, or open only at hours they are working. Compared with that, a course finished slowly at home is a clear gain.
In conclusion, online study has genuine weaknesses, particularly for practical subjects and for students who need supervision, but for the many adults it reaches, the advantages are the greater ones.
Language worth borrowing
- In my opinion the benefits of this change are greater than the drawbacks, although it does not suit every X.
- Answers do the advantages outweigh directly, with a limit.
- ...which matters enormously to people who study after work.
- Adds who benefits. An advantage is stronger when it has a person attached.
- The disadvantages are real, however.
- Signals the turn honestly. Examiners reward a fair treatment of the other side.
- The comparison is not between X and perfect Y.
- A reframing sentence. This is the kind of thinking that lifts an essay.
- Compared with that, X is a clear gain.
- Draws the conclusion from the comparison you have just set up.
Why this would score well
The four things an examiner marks, and what this essay does about each. The wording of the criteria is IELTS's own and is published for candidates; the comments are ours.
| Criterion | What this essay does |
|---|---|
| Task Response | Both sides are covered and a verdict is given. The final paragraph names who the format does not suit. |
| Coherence and Cohesion | Advantages, disadvantages, then the comparison that decides between them: a shape the reader can follow. |
| Lexical Resource | Precise ordinary language: reach, supervision, resist the format. No memorised phrases. |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | Comparatives carry the argument (greater than, far more ... than), used accurately throughout. |
Check your own attempt
- Did you actually give a verdict, or only list both sides?
- Are your advantages and disadvantages different points, not the same point reversed?
- Did you say who the disadvantage affects most?
- Did you avoid inventing figures for drop-out rates?
- Is the conclusion a judgement rather than a summary?
- Are you between 250 and 300 words?
Use it, do not memorise it
An essay learnt by heart is easy to spot and cannot fit the question you are actually given. Take the shapes from Language worth borrowing, write your own answer to this question in forty minutes, then compare.
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